Patrick Christian Barbosa

                       In Memory Of....

You never said I'm leaving

You never said goodbye

You were gone before I knew it,

And only God knew why

A million times I needed you,

A million times I cried

If love alone could have saved you,

You never would have died

In life I loved you dearly

In death I love you still

In my heart you hold a place, That no one could ever fill

                                           ~Anonymous

                  ­

            FOREVER IN MY HEART AND ON MY MIND

                 And Then Came Death To Us… Why?

Because of incompetence and negligence from the doctors, my son

Patrick’s life was cut short needlessly.

Because of lack of communication between his primary doctor and the ER doctors, I was left behind to grieve my indescribable loss.

Because I love my son more than life, I am walking an unthinkable, lonely, empty journey with no will to live.

Because I am a religious person, I can’t voluntarily join my son Patrick in Heaven… I have to fight off the thoughts constantly… only God should take life… no one else.

Because of trusting these incompetent doctors, I have to live with this

unbearable agony, guilt for not seeking for a second opinion with my son’s health…welfare.

Because I miss Patrick so much, this hole in my heart, in my soul will

never be healed.

Because I want my son back in my life so badly, this unbearable pain will only stop the day I meet him again.

Because of power and money, the healthcare let me down and also let my son Patrick down… and then death came to us…Why? My life was over the day I lost my son Patrick, for my son did not go alone… he took my life with him.

Because of a wrongful death from these incompetent doctors, my life

will never be the same without my precious son Patrick…

I will never see my son Patrick for the rest of my life

I will never see my son Patrick graduating from college

as a Computer Engineer he was so looking for

I will never see my son Patrick getting married

I will never see my son Patrick building a family

of his own… making a life with his girlfriend Monica. Dam you!

Because I was robbed of my son Patrick’s future, my future is

gone as well, and I can only live each moment in a daze with my unanswered questions piercing my broken heart and deepening this hole in my shattered soul… Why? Why? Why?

Because of that fated day July 15, 2009 when I found my poor son

Patrick lifeless in bed after the doctor had reassured me and my son

he will be fine… it is just a GI bug, I am engulfed with intense pain,

disbelief, choking sobs throughout the day and restless at night with

the light on all night… because night means death and death means

Patrick is not here with me, with his family where he belongs.

Because of my son’s death, I get up every morning after a restless,

sobbing night with a sharp pain right through my broken heart for just five minutes to remind me of my horrible loss… Patrick is really not here with me! Fourteen months of agony, my pain is getting worse and worse... They took my whole life not just my son's life.

Because of that shocking, agonizing reality, the disbelief creeps back into my shattered life for the rest of the day with intense pain, sadden tears… Patrick cannot be gone!… he just can’t! The doctors promised us Patrick will be fine… it is just a GI bug… just a GI bug! Then what happened to my son?

Why did I have to find my son lifeless in bed after seeing him alive just few hours earlier?

What kind of care did they give to my poor, innocent son?

What happened to the oath the doctors took to respect life not neglect life?

Since I lost my son Patrick, I have heard so many horror stories about

Kent Hospital. Why didn’t I hear these horror stories just two days before July 15? I would have never taken my son to that Cats and dogs hospital… Kent hospital should be shut down for good!!!

These incompetent doctors who did not care for my son Patrick properly, do not deserve to care for any other human being… they deserve to have

their licenses taking away for good!!!

Why these doctors did not take care of my son properly? Why?

I need some answers! I need justice, because I don’t understand my

new journey or my son Patrick’s new journey… it does not make sense!

Because I am his mother and he is my son FOREVER!!!, Patrick lives on in my heart, in my soul, in my life and beyond!

Because I trust Jesus, I will see again my son Patrick, and I am looking

forward to our reunion… this world is really unfair, sad!

My son’s life and memories will never be forgotten, for love never ENDS!!!

HEALTH CARE AWARENESS IN MEMORY OF

MY SON PATRICK CHRISTIAN BARBOSA!!!

PLEASE RESPECT LIFE. DON'T RAPE IT FOR MONEY OR POWER.

LIFE IS A GIFT FROM GOD. PATRICK HAD A PURPOSE IN LIFE...

A DREAM THAT HAD MATTERED...TO HIS MOTHER, TO HIM, HIS
FAMILY, AND HIS FRIENDS.

DESPITE OF A SENSELESS ACT OF NEGLIGENCE... A SENSELESS WASTE OF PATRICK'S LIFE, MY PRECIOUS SON WILL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN, FOR PATRICK LIVES ON!!!

          FOREVER IN MY HEART AND ON MY MIND

Children who die are not really gone,
But go to a place that is something like home,
Where they sleep the deep sleep, as quiet as stone,
Until we can join them when our lives are done.

Children who die are not really dead,
But just like good children tucked into bed,
Wait the long wait while we go ahead
Till our tales are all told and our tears are all shed.
Children who die feel no pleasure or pain
In the place where they wait till they see us again,
And all of us dance in a world washed with rain
Where the sun shines so brightly no sorrows remain.

- Author Unknown

                 

                             

                

 

                                       

                              

 Do not believe that I'm dead and gone
I want you to know that in spirit I live on
Never weep when you gaze at that one empty chair
Don't you know that quite often I come and sit there
I still know when you're ill
Or when you have a bad day
I am only a whisper or a heartbeat away
For I still walk where you walk
I still hold your hand
My footprints aren't there when you walk through the sand
But my voice can be heard in the sound of the sea
Or in a child's laughter when it's bounced on your knee
You can hear me when a cool breeze rustles through flowers
Or in the tree tops that bend with the first evening showers
I whisper to you in the still of the night
If you could but see me you would know I'm alright
So search with your eyes
You may glimpse me one day
As I stand there and watch little children at play
I'm the light in the window
I'm the snowflake that falls
I'm the shadow in the moonlight
I'm the night bird that calls
My spirit lives on although my earth time is done
I'm still part of the earth
I'm lit by the sun
So smile for me please
I don't want you to grieve
I'm well and I'm strong
I didn't really leave
When your time comes to go
The last thing you'll see
Is my smile as I whisper "You're coming to me"
For death isn't final
As you close your eyes
There's a light far more brighter than blue summer skies
I'll lead you towards it
Our loved ones are there
Laughing and strong
Free of all earthly care
I've been patiently waiting for you to pass through
For death simply means "Reunited with you"

*ღ..........*ღ*..........*ღ*..........*ღ*..........ღ*

                                     Author Unknown

                                              Lord I Want To Know You

Lord I want to know you more, than just a figment of the mind,
I want to know you in a way, that I will let Your light shine.
I hear others talk about the intimacy they have with You.
I want to get to know You like they say they do.

You know the longing I have for You, way down inside of me,
I want that joy, that overflow, that makes me feel free.
I know I'm Your's and You are mine, for You forgave my sins,
I know You did that for me Lord, for I remember when.

You've been my Lord for many years, and I love You so much,
I yearn to get so near to You that I can feel Your touch.
I've had days and weeks to pass on by I didn't feel You near.
I learned a long time ago to trust You without fear.

Feelings can be deceiving - they will carry you up and down,
but faith is still believing even if you frown.
With faith we can do anything that we believe Him for,
So trust Him with your need and watch your faith soar.

He is a God of miracles, just look all around and see,
He made the world we're living in, even you and me.
When troubles come and times are hard, just cast them at His feet,
There is nothing too hard for Him that He can't possibly meet.

Don't pout and doubt, and leave God out, or get all riled up,
remember that our Savior was willing to drink the bitter cup.
He did it all for you and me because He loved us so,
I want to please this Lord of mine, and to heaven I want to go.

Now let me just say this, in case you have never ever heard,
Jesus Christ died according to His own Word.
He paid a great price to redeem and save you from sin,
You have the best and easiest part, by letting the Savior come in.

                                               Mary Eldridge

                                 I AM ALWAYS HERE WITH YOU ALL

          A LETTER FROM HEAVEN WITH LOVE TO MY NIECE ALYANA

Dear Precious niece Alyana,

Although I am gone away to another world and you can’t really see me,

Know that I am also very close to you in your life, in your heart, on your mind,

 For I am just a thought away and a heartbeat away from you.

Whenever you miss me just close your eyes and think of me,

And I will be right there along your thoughts to comfort you.

Whenever you feel sad because you miss me or anything little

Things bother you, share your feelings with me, and

 I will be right there to ease your worries, fears, and sadness.

Whenever you feel lost, helpless, just call my name, I will be right

There to guide you, to strengthen your faith and hope.

Whenever tears mist your eyes, just let the tears fall down your

Cheeks, and I will gently wipe them with a nice thought about me

That will bring a smile on your pretty face and a cool breeze on your cheeks.

Whenever you have a recurring dream about me or visits from me just know I am guiding you along your path as God’s special messenger to you.

Whenever you see a butterfly around you, I am sending you a message to my mom that I am really OK in Heaven with God and I never left her.

I am always around my family because I love you all and I do miss you all.

Keep your mind open in growing, learning that there is another world

beyond this earth I just left, which is called “Heaven“…God’s home.

I am still very much with you as a spiritual being not just in your

Heart and mind. Precious niece believe we will all meet again one day,

But for now be very happy in my memory and keep me alive in your memory.

I thank you for keeping me in your prayers, for thinking of me, for

Remembering me, for honoring me, and for keeping the memories lane open

Now that I am away with God, Jesus, and Blessed Mother in our new home.

I will always be in your life because I am not just your uncle Patrick,

But I am also now your very own guardian Angel including my whole family’s.

My gift of love to you for Christmas is to be a good role model to your sister Braelynne, your brother Mason Patrick and even your mom and dad, but more importantly trust in God to show you the way. Your brother is a beautiful and precious gift for all of you.

Love him and enjoy him with all your heart. I am very honored he is named after me and I thank your mom and dad for their love. Keep the harmony within my brothers Steve, Frederick, and Kevin to strengthen their faith about the precious gift of life, family, and love. And it’s OK to get involved with family’s silliest flaws because you are our Sunshine. From Heaven I send you my love and my blessings for a brighter Christmas and future. I love you. I miss you too.

WARMEST WISHES TO MY FAMILY! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO MY BEAUTIFUL NIECE ALYANA!

Always by your side, Uncle Patrick Christian Barbosa

  HAVE A GLORIOUS HEAVENLY JOURNEY SON

MAY JESUS HOLD MY HAND AND YOUR HAND

ALONG MY JOURNEY SON, FOR I NEED YOU BOTH. PEACE AND LOVE, MOM.

    MERRY CHRISTMAS TO PATRICK AND JOHN 

                                           A LOVE  CONFESSION                                                   

       Patrick, my precious son, Loving you is the most incredible

      experience to feel.

      Losing you is the most unbearable feeling and thought to accept.

      Missing you is the most indescribable pain, agony to endure.

      Walking this horrible journey is the most torturous path of my life.

      Longing for your presence is the most aching obsession to let go.

      Keeping your precious memories alive is the greatest grace from God

      To receive, and I will always pray for it.

      Until God call me to join you, praying for you and keeping you in

     my heart and soul, and on my mind is my undying gift of love for my son.

                                                            LostMom to Patrick Barbosa