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Mom MY ANGEL, PATRICK November 12, 2009
 



                                      THE BROKEN CHAIN

              We little knew that morning that God
                   Was going to call your name.
                   in life we love you dearly,
               In death we do the same. It broke
               Our hearts to lose you; you did not go
                Alone, for part of us went with you,
                    The day God called you home.
                     You left us peaceful memories;
                      Your love is still our guide.
                And though we cannot see you,
                You are always at our side.
                 Our family chain is broken,
                  And nothing seems the same;
                       But as God calls us
                   One by one, THE CHAIN
                        Will link again.

                                                                       AUTHOR UNKNOWN     

                PATRICK, MY ANGEL, THE CHAIN WILL SURELY LINK AGAIN HAPPILY.

                                                     I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU ETERNALLY   
Mom THE PRICE OF LOVE November 11, 2009
 



                                                         THE PRICE OF LOVE

                    My beautiful baby boy, Patrick was born
                    I was filled with happiness and grace
                    Along the milestones, dreams and hopes filled my heart...
                    My thoughts for my son and his three brothers
                    Then, Boom! For a second, Patrick's life was shortened.
                    All my hopes and dreams for my son were ceased
                    And I was left with only short memories...
                    And no more pictures of my son to look for
                    For God had called him home and a big part of me went with my son
                    Since then, I wake up with my anger, my disbelief, and great sorrow
                    And through the day, I feel powerless with my anger, my disbelief, great sorrow
                    With my restless nights, I go to bed holding my anger, my disbelief, great sorrow
                    After my body is too drained and numb to feel anything.
                    Since I lost my son, my torturous feelings are my companions into my journey.

                    Though my pain, sorrow, and sad tears are from loosing my son
                    My joy is masking my pain and agony and pretending to live in this world to fit in
                    A world who can never understand my loss... My agony.
                    My son is now in heaven where they say there is no pain, no anger, sorrow
                    While I am here on  earth  full of pain, anger, sorrow, and my sad tears
                    With the deepest grief my weak body, my broken heart and soul can not handle
                    Why me? Why my son, a beautiful heart?
                     When there are evil people, killers, rapists  distroying this earth.

                     About four months ago, I had my four sons
                     And today, I still have my four sons
                     For Patrick still lives in my heart and mind
                     His presence still remains in our home
                     As I have his last pictures scattered in every corner of our home

                     As I know that grief is the greatest pain in our life
                     I also do know now without any doubt the pain of grief I am feeling
                     Is the price of being a mother and loving my son so much
                     I also know I am not afraid of death, the one thing I was so fearful for my sons,
                     Will take me to my son who had never left me
                      For he was always living safe in my heart and mind
                      Until then, I will look for  your visits in my dreams
                      That make me feel alive and happy
                      Until I wake up and begin all over my worst journey... My dreadful life.   
        
                                                                       
                                                                                                  GISELE G BARBOSA

 Dedicated to my loving son, Patrick


                                              
Mom I MISS MY SON November 11, 2009
 
                                          

    LOVE NEVER DIES... A MOTHER IS FOREVER
    MY LOVING MEMORIES AND LIFE WILL BE ALIVE
    IN MY HEART AND SOUL.




                        I MISS YOU MY SON SO DEARLY, AND NO ONE WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND
                         THE DEPTH OF MY PAIN... MY SORROW... MY LOSS.

 


     YOU ARE LOVED, CHERISHED, REMEMBERED, AND MISSED FOREVER!!!
                                              
Mom YOUR HOME IS IN MY HEART November 11, 2009
 
    
                                             When I am dead, come to me at my grave,
                                              And the more often the better...
                                              As you spoke to me as I was alive, do so now.
                                               For I am living, and I shall be FOREVER.

                                                                                             ST. SERAFIM Of SAROV 

                       Hi, Son. I  hope your headstone will not take long to get to you.
                       I don't want  a rush work because I want a perfect, special
                       headstone for you. Nevertheless I don't like to see a plain one.
                       Having a gravestone will not give me a closure because you are still alive
                        In my heart, soul, and life FOREVER.

                         Winter season, the dry leaves that are all over your grave site
                           deepen my sadness, my grief, my depression.
                           I am sorry I don't go to visit you as often as I would love to.
                            But when I am there with you, I treasure the moment we spend
                             With me talking while playing and listening to Michael Jackson songs.
                             With my loving son.
   
                              BE AT PEACE AND KNOW THAT YOUR MOTHER LOVES YOU VERY MUCH
                               AND I WILL KEEP YOU ALIVE IN MY HEART AND SOUL FOREVER.    



Mom GRIEVING MY GREAT LOSS November 11, 2009
 



                                   
                       Grief is an emotion, not a disease. There is no time table for recovery.
                        But there is also no getting around the pain. Each of us has to experience
                        the pain in order to recover from it...
                        Our hopes and dreams may no longer be possible.
                         We may feel hopeless and want to run away.
                         It takes time and effort to regain the ability to function.
                          We must express our feelings and be patient with ourselves.
                            Grief is a process. Recovery is a decision.
                             Readjustment does not come overnight.
                             But each of us can resolve to survive- one moment at a time.

                                          
                                                                                            AUTHOR UNKNOWN

                         I MISS YOU, MY SON... I MISS YOU...
Mom MY SON, MY LOSS, MY GRIEF, MY JOURNEY November 10, 2009
 



                                THE TWELVE FREEDOMS OF HEALING IN GRIEF

                  1-  You have the freedom to realize your grief in unique.

                  2-   You have the freedom to talk about your grief.

                   3-  You have the freedom to expect to feel a multitude of emotions.

                    4-  You have the freedom to allow for numbness.
                   
                    5-  You have the freedom to be tolerant of your physical and emotional limits.

                    6-  You have the freedom to experience grief attacks or memory embraces.

                     7-  You have the freedom to develop a support system.

                      8-  You have the freedom to make use of ritual.

                      9-  You have the freedom to embrace your spirituality.

                      10-  You have the freedom to allow a search for meaning.

                      11-  You have the freedom to treasure your memories.

                      12-  You have the freedom to move toward your grief and heal.


                                                                                   ALAN WOLFELDT, PHD.       

 
         PATRICK, PART OF ME WENT WITH YOU THE DAY GOD CALLED YOU HOME.
         SINCE THEN I HAVE A HOLE IN MY HEART... I WILL GRIEF MY TREMENDOUS LOSS
         ON MY OWN TERMS  AS I KEEP YOU ALIVE IN MY HEART AND SOUL
         UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN.

                                                           I LOVE YOU. BE SAFE AND HAPPY. 
Mom YOU ARE FOREVER REMEMBERED, MY SON November 10, 2009
 




                                                 REMEMBER ME

                       To the living, I am gone
                        To the sorrowful, I will never return
                         To the angry, I was cheated
                         But, to the happy, I am at peace
                          And to the faithful, I have never left
                          I can not speak, but I can listen
                           I can not be seen, but I can be heard
                           So as you stand upon the shore
                            Gazing at the beautiful sea, remember me
                            As you look in awe at a mighty forest
                             And its grand majesty, remember me
                             Remember me in your hearts,
                             In your thoughts, and the memories of the
                              Times we loved, the times we cried, the
                               Battle I fought and the times we laughed
                               For if you always think of me,
                               I will have never gone

                                                                                       AUTHOR UNKNOWN

                            My son, the one thing that separates you and this poem, is the fight
                            You had never believed in fight or violence. You were an angel on earth
                             And today you still are an angel in heaven.

                              With God grace, your life and memories will always be alive and vibrant
                               In this world, my heart, my life, my soul.
                               Be safe, happy, and at peace ETERNALLY.

                               I LOVE YOU DEARLY, my SON     

                                                              
Mom PROUD TO BE YOUR MOTHER November 10, 2009
 



             Realizing I had a short time with you, pierces my heart
             Remembering you were growing in my womb, brings me joy
             Knowing I gave birth to you, makes me a very happy and proud mother
             Having you in my life as my son, touches my soul
             Accepting you as my Angel, reassures me I will see you again
             But believing you are not here physically, is the hardest thing for your mother to accept
             Because I love you, miss you so much, and need my son dearly in my life
             Until we meet again, I am so proud to be your mother on Earth and in Heaven.

                                                                                                  GISELE G BARBOSA

To my loving son, Patrick   
                                         
Mom MY ANGEL, PATRICK AND HIS NEW FRIENDS IN HEAVEN November 8, 2009
 


                      My Angel, Patrick has met now the other angels in Heaven:
                      Michael Jackson, my late mother-in law, Dominga Tavares,
                      My late father, Gabriel Gomez, Princess Diana, Patrick Swayze,
                      The beautiful Star, Selena. Q. Peres, and my hero singer, Mike Brant
                     
                       May these candles lit keep burning happily, safely, and peacefully over your
                       beautiful spirits ETERNALLY.

                               YOU ARE ALL FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS!!!

                             YOU ARE ALL LOVED, REMEMBERED, AND SO DEARLY MISSED ETERNALLY!!!

                                              BE AT PEACE!!! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!
Mom Patrick, I wish you were HERE November 6, 2009
 



                PATRICK, I CAN GO AROUND AND AROUND MY EMPTY WORLD
               OR OVER AND OVER MY FEEBLE MIND
              OR DEEPER AND DEEPER MY HEARTACHE UNTIL I  FREEZE
              I WILL STILL COME BACK TO THAT FATED DAY THAT ROBBED ME OF MY SON
              AND TOOK AWAY MY FUTURE...My LIFE... My SOUL
              PERHAPS A CRYSTAL BALL COULD HAVE HELPED ME
              NOT TO TRUST THE ANGEL OF DEATH AND SAVE MY PRECIOUS SON
              BUT I WAS JUST A HELPLESS, POWERLESS, AND INNOCENT VICTIM AS YOU WERE
              I AM STILL HELPLESS, POWERLESS WITH A GREATER LOSS AND ANGUISH
              IN AN EMPTY ROAD SEARCHING FOR ANSWER... FOR HELP... FOR MY SON
              WHOM I MISSED IMMENSELY...AND ALWAYS WILL AND LOVE FOREVER.

                                                                                   
                                                                                                 GISELE G BARBOSA


To my Loving son, PATRICK              
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